Ms.Sheila

The Man Child

.

I try so hard to write of good things;

I want to write of the good...

yet here I am once again so

angry... so incredibly angry.

.

Is this how life is to be?

.

If so,

Where can I place my anger?

What does one do with it?

Why is there so little good?

.

I have moments of calm,

moments of concern,

moments to

weep for you in fear;

and monumental

moments of dealing with

your unpredictable, childish

outbursts that thrust me into

damage control

and fill me with anger.

.

I sometimes wonder if it's me

that's slowly tilting.....

I don't know what to do

with the barrage of emotions

that leave me as tense

as if I were in

an emotional war zone

.

Still, I have managed thus far,

right?

.

Ahh, yes here it comes once again,

a meaningless

apology

.

..... sigh ....

.

I am so very tired

even of my own sarcasm

.

So incredibly tired

because there is no hope

and never was.

I chose a man child

.

I live with it.